JOHN RALPH TUCCITTO IS 'SARDONIC POET'
  • About the Author
  • Orchestral Flatulence
  • Mythology of the Muse
  • Book Appointment
  • 确定性文化使我们分裂。
  • The Dearth of Empathy
  • What is Sardonicism?
  • The Simulation of Doubt
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According to the latest United States Department of Agriculture distribution maps, Cure-for-it-all, can be found in Florida from Broward County southward, and also in Marion and Pinellas counties. Hawaii is the only other state where it grows, and there's no doubt it is an introduced plant. It's native to the Caribbean, including the Bahamas, Central America and parts of South America.

In areas where it's native, cure-for-it-all is used to treat a long list of ailments, including malaria and uterine fibroids. According to the USDA, it's used to control fever, relieve sore throats and stomach problems and as an analgesic. It's used in poultices for wounds and skin ulcers. Laboratory research with rats confirm the plant has analgesic and anti-inflammatory properties. But cure-for-it-all is also a problem plant, particularly in parts of Asia and the Pacific, where it's considered an invasive. It is an aggressive plant, quickly colonizing open areas and forming thickets that block out native species. How it got to the Pacific in the first place is a bit of a question, but researchers have noticed a correlation between its presence and the sites of World War II air bases throughout the region.

http://www.wildsouthflorida.com/cure-for-it-all.html#.X9voUsDEjDs

    Confirm you have read "The Mythology of the Muse."

    Why do you need to confirm that you've read 'The Mythology of the Muse?'  Context.  As the author I require my readers to have full context in order to interpret my work accurately.  If you have not read 'The Mythology of the Muse' and insist on proceeding, your curiosity is responsible for your ignorance.  My job as a Sardonic Poet (Counterfeit Evangelist) is to exchange your ignorance for awareness (gradually).  If you have no context, the exchange between ignorance and awareness will not be gradual; it will trigger psychosis (I know from experience).  This book is for advanced minds only.  You must have context.

    "I confirm I have read all three books of 'The Mythology of the Muse.'
    Which was your favorite book?
I Confirm I have read "The Mythology of the Muse."
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Backcopy

As a demonstration of my intelligence, I will flaunt the fragility of my species with pure honesty.  I am prepared to suffer the consequences of my hubris, because the alternative is unthinkable. What’s unthinkable? Whatever lies beyond boredom’s bosom. Never tolerate distractions that make boredom intolerable. Either way, you are in the right place to witness a man (me) going into debt publishing books that will get him divorced, arrested, killed, and damned (assuming my publisher published this unmolested). I’m a spark’s shadow who enjoyed the novelties of brain damage experiencing psychosis (sounds cooler than I remember). I have a SEVERE lust for contemplation, and as I write this down, I am convinced I will have no chance of success; I attempt to achieve the impossible again and again because I LOVE to lose. Case and point: doubt is the God you reject, and it’s plausible; that much (as you will see) I have proven.
 
You will be fucking STUPEFIED how much you relate to a philosophy that is so egregiously…transparent. Do you value honesty? Not after you read this book. Lies levy the truth regarding our dishonesty. I’m going to SHATTER stigma, and only then will you understand why stigma is a necessary convenience. Why do you reject God? You resent pain.  That’s because you are afraid of your own confidence. Why? You love to lose. You are too shy. God asks you for something that is too simple: surrender. You are too shy for surrender. Wait…so you’re not shy? Prove it. Your resentment toward pain (and simplicity) secures you in comfort below God’s tolerance for mediocrity. God is your Satan. To a devil like you…God is Satan. The one true Satan knows that. I’m a Sardonic Poet…I hunt fire for a living. I damn my soul (on purpose) and document my journey toward those (like you) who mock the inevitable. I just want to be ignorant again…wisdom is a scam.
 
Doors are for closing, but before you do…tell the horse to stay thirsty. If by the end of this book you still don’t believe in God? Remember, the answer needs a puzzle. You’re the puzzle--not the answer.

Hypocrites Read No Further

I swore to God if he spares my family from COVID-19, I will NEVER publish a book again. I’m not sure prayer works that way, but I know I have the conviction to follow through with it. There’s no such thing as a mistake just because you were wrong. Writing is my addiction because I hold it above God. By sacrificing this unprofitable habit, I would sacrifice my prestige, not my addiction. Prestige consecrates my addiction. With the stupidity of my conviction, the plan was to starve my ego (publishing no more books) so I would be unable to disable my morality. Publishing books is one of the most prestigious things you can do as a human. Look…I am not Jesus (thank God for that). I am just a Sardonic Poet, Counterfeit Evangelist, False Prophet. The fear of damnation compels me to preach honesty, not truth. Biiig difference. The stupidity of my conviction would prefer I revere the disapproval of those who dictate how I earn my failures. I’ve learned that failure is earned…thanks to the stupidity of conviction. How are you supposed to learn from your failures if you are too stubborn to accept you don’t need approval to succeed? That’s why (if you must) you rely on non-partisan sources where it is in their best interests to be honest with you (not transparent).
I wrote this book because:
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  1. I want to share my perverted wisdom.
  2. I want to prove I am honest.

Do you value honesty? Liar.

As you are bound to be offended by this book, your continued participation now confirms any reaction you deem offensive (as the result of reading this book) is entirely the result of your inability to empathize with evil’s “unpalatable” side. I’ve done my best to make these observations valuable for preventing and recovering from sexual abuse and addiction. By reading the following sentences (in bold), you confirm you forever surrender your rights to retaliate legally (and illegally) against anyone or anything that serves to sully the reputations of the author, editor, artist, and publisher of this book. Should I (the author) alone determine without untrue influences (and intimidation) your criticism inferred my intent correctly, that confirms to those who wish to know my honesty has not been misconstrued as a spiritual inconvenience or personal attack; this is furthest from my intent. Failing to maintain a clinical and objective outlook whilst reading this book will result in short-term and/or long-term psychological consequences that will permanently taint your relationships, especially with family and friends. If you cannot forget regret…I insist you walk away from this book. Do yourself a favor and fuck off, bitch.
 
Message to editor/reviewer: Take my money and walk away. I’m serious. I authorize it. It’s in print. Don’t read this book, just slap it together and publish it. There’s no courage in ambition, because courage is subjective. I just wanted to show you my courage to attempt the impossible. Charmed? You’ve been warned. It’s not worth it. Walk away, bitch. This book will ruin your life. 
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Satan     It gets worse…come…learn why pain is charming. How can pain be charming? Read on to find out.
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John      Well, reader…I guess you don’t believe me. I can’t stop you now.
 
That’s PRECISELY why evil thrives amidst your cowardice and hypocrisy; it’s transparent (not honest). Do you value transparency? What’s the difference between transparency and honesty? Honesty helps you relate to evil, while transparency shamelessly exposes our skeletons to be judged by selfish cowards and hypocrites; is that your motivation to read further? Wait, why do you want to relate to evil? Simple, you are not perfect; there is evil in you. Better to be honest and relate to something you cannot control, versus accusing others of devilment. Judgment deflects guilt. If you are looking to judge me, you value transparency (not honesty). Well, through my honesty you will relate to evil that affects our urges in ways we cannot control thinking about. There’s nothing you can do about it. It’s called conception. Maybe you’ve heard of it. It’s kind of a pest.

Sure, it’s “cool” to romanticize evil through sheepish poems, but sexual abuse of children is as despicable as humanity gets; it’s not a “public” topic we exploit, because sexual abuse reflects its polarity best between the sexes. Factor in the belief that there are more than two genders; it remains a hugely untapped economy for the world. Economy? Why economy? Thoughts (you can’t control) are illegal. Think about that (if you’re allowed). I’m under no delusion of the consequences…

Satan     Liar.

…I will face simply for writing…about our addiction to TRANSITION! We are addicted to “transition” in the hope it creates youth or siphons it. As a father, as a man…I don’t want my children to be victims of rape and molestation. I especially don’t want to make things worse…if they do end up being victims of rape and molestation, I would want to help them make a full recovery. I don’t know if I can protect their fate. Writing this book is my way of trying. Get it? Evil never bets…it banks on the likelihood you will reject my honesty (for fear of the consequences): my thoughts are illegal according to the definition (as you’ll see), and as you’re reading my words, you are an accessory to a crime (DOH!). Thoughts you cannot control…are illegal (by definition). I’m a father…I have the *gulp* courage to expose this evil.

Satan     Courage is subjective.

We must resist (not stop) sexualizing our young. I don’t presume to know how to fix this, other than to speak openly about it. You CANNOT police thoughts, otherwise we would ALL be guilty. All I’m doing is recording my thoughts…is that illegal? I’m not plotting to commit a crime, I’m not advocating crime; I’m just documenting the human mind when morality is disabled; it’s the only way I can empathize with my evil. Will no one else come forward? Am I just a lonely pedophile (according to the definition). Oh, my…you don’t know it? Well, let me jog your memory:
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“a person who is sexually attracted to children.”
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Even briefly, even unintentionally…is ILLEGAL. Your thoughts are illegal, according to the definition.

If wisdom consumes innocence, you might as well police breathing for all the good that’ll do. Psychosis taught me that; read chapter 42.1.0 in my third book, Culture of One: The Mythology of the Muse for full context. According to Wikipedia:

Psychosis is an abnormal condition of the mind that results in difficulties determining what is real and what is not. Symptoms may include false beliefs (delusions) and seeing or hearing things that others do not see or hear (hallucinations). Other symptoms may include incoherent speech and behavior that is inappropriate for the situation. There may also be sleep problems, social withdrawal, lack of motivation, and difficulties carrying out daily activities.

During the peak of psychosis, I had become sexually attracted to my two-year-old daughter. Unfortunately now…I understand the appeal of pedophilia (in principle); thankfully, my daughter was not harmed or scarred. I think it’s my duty to talk openly about it, if only to address society’s moral failings. I think we have to be aware that we are not alone. For example: I am sexually attracted to underage teen girls; I know I’m not alone. If this news to you, you are a liar:

Satan     Heh, he ain’t lyin.

If wisdom consumes innocence, children are regarded as contraception (to a pedophile) because sexually abusing children will unlikely result in incriminating the offender. Why? Pedophile-denial. Think about that, it’s a helluva catch-22. Accusing someone else of being a pedophile is like accusing yourself. How do you know what activity to look for to be so concerned? See… That said, imagine if you accused someone of being a pedophile and it was proven false?! How would YOUR mistake be judged? Would people accuse you of pedophilia out of retaliation? Are your thoughts illegal? Have those thoughts been recorded somehow? Best keep your suspicions to yourself. Then there’s the dilemma if you realize your brief, unintentional thoughts are in fact illegal (according to the definition); who’s going to arrest me? You’re in luck. You are not alone with your concern. We are all pedophiles (by definition). Pedophiles keep the economy going. The economy of human nature is driven by YOUTH. Get it? MODESTY is bad for business…business would rather kill than lose money. *gulp* People need to start acting their age. How do you act your age when everyone who wants to be older…is too young, and everyone who wants to be younger…is too old. That is why we sexualize what we cannot sow:

  • When children don’t act their age, we resist sexualizing them.
  • When adults don’t act their age, they resist sexualizing us.

Why resist instead of stop? Why resist something you cannot sow? Exactly…you don’t want it, but that doesn’t encourage the appeal to retreat. Is your silence evidence of our mutual insanity? I believe so. I believe (to a pedophile) that silence is consent. Does consent discriminate against age? That has all the potential for an illegal thought to spread like a virus. That’s why these thoughts are illegal, because our minds are one communal petri dish. Lawmakers are programming people by mandating sexual activities not occur with “guilty” offenders. Their strategy? Humans produce shame (ironically) for protection; 
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shame is like a mother-snake protecting its young (emotional triggers are snake bites). Shame shields our uncontrollable and sensitive inadequacies from being accessed (inadequacies are the snake’s young). The deeper our inadequacies take root, the more shame (we require) to rely on its “protection.” Our inadequacies can be manipulated through the influence of celebrity (false prophets). Question…how do celebrities behave? Does their fashion trigger our inadequacies? Does the natural response to inadequacy make us feel shame? If so, does that portion respond predictably to judgment? Does that judgmental influence of celebrity discriminate by age? Is that mutual insanity? Is that consent? While you are locked in debate, children learn from their inadequacies (like an institution) to rely on shame’s protection steering them clear… of their “triggers,” so shame (not honesty) can remain an invaluable function (invaluable to whom?). Maturity is constantly losing its ground to youth. Kids don’t act their age (and the law abiders must resist sexualizing them). Why resist? Thanks to puberty, why resist something you can sow? Get it? That’s why pedophilia is against the law.

Psychosis taught me that my fear painted with certainty. That was during my psychotic episode that hospitalized me. So, thanks to psychosis…I’m a pedophile according to the definition. Either the definition has to change, or we have to accept we are all pedophiles (by definition) because thoughts you can’t control are illegal. Given our obsession with youth, how is this not obvious? The stigma shames the “guilty” and rewards the SHAMELESS. My position is we are all guilty by definition (except for the shameless). The shameless are sexually abusing children unabashedly. The “guilty” are shackled beneath their “illegal” thoughts for fear of consequences (policed by the shameless); you know, should people like me risk speaking out. GET IT?! The shameless control the guilty by monetizing moral promiscuity (shame is invaluable to the shameless). If you are offended by this leap of judgment, congratulations, I wish I was as ignorant as you are. Don’t be selfish and make this a petty witch hunt to extinguish your guilty conscience. You sit with this knowledge, and you look at the world with fresh eyes. Think about the changes you could petition to help steer this natural phenomenon toward the light of honesty (not transparency):

Youth ages Wisdom. Wisdom ages Youth. Think the thoughts you think. Voilà!
 
Satan     Well, you’ve had me in stiches this time. You have risked everything you have for nothing. Another one bites the dust. I always liked that song.

John      I should end the book here, but…there’s no reason why I can’t just continue. I have the answer, errr, puzzle. This will most likely be the last book I ever write, so I better make it count.

Satan     As always, you have my blessing.
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John      Thanks. Reader (assuming you’ve made it this far), I’m going to reveal the key. Remember, this is all we are. I don’t promise you anything but revealing the peril you ignore through your ignorance. What will stop at nothing to control the world? I’ll give you a hint: it rhymes with Jews. 
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RE: For your sanity

Never apologize for who you are. You are not a mistake; you are simply a lesson to learn your path will never exclude infamy. There’s no such thing as a mistake; there’s no such thing as choice, because your path is scripted. All you can do is anticipate the unknown. We have the illusion of choice, but you can’t change the future any more than you can change the past. You are not a mistake, so don’t be sorry. Why do you work to acquire unnecessary things as a substitute for pride? Is that where your loyalty lies, within currency? Why? Ultimately, you are loyal to a piece of dung, confident it is worthy of your energy. There’s only so much land to farm and ocean to fish, whereas the only limiting factor for enterprise is greed. People are loyal only to the rise of opportunity (in exchange of evidence) if...your energy equaled value. That evidence is currency. That means you are what you’re worth (through things).

What I know and do is a pestilence to those who are superior. What I do naturally earns me the title of pest. What makes me a pest? I don’t apologize for who I am (I’m not sorry). Think about that. I know I am not a mistake, and I cherish my dignity. In the spirit of honesty, I may be wrong. That doesn’t register with you, nor should it. But I don’t apologize for who I am. If you can’t say the same, then you know what I stand to lose if I’m wrong: my reputation. Do you know what’s great about being a pest? It comes naturally to search between my senses to scoop out a reality that merits discussion. Your brain (like mine) is hypnotized by the integrity of your perception. For example, the world would appear distorted if I removed my glasses.

Humans are such narcissists, their minds corrupt what reality serves as a contract that cannot be negotiated. You are not God, but the vain want to be. The universe does not live in your shadow simply because you value nothing but your own skull. I don’t apologize for who I am, and I cherish my dignity. Do you apologize for yourself? Don’t be sorry, because you are not a mistake; you are a lesson to learn. Your path will never exclude infamy. My words don’t belong to me; they belong to an ideal. I am what I’m worth, and as reality’s student I have no salary to buy things. I live to serve others by writing their story. Use me to tell your story. I am a Sardonic Poet, Counterfeit Evangelist, and I dare to know why I reject God with doubt. If you have the courage to know yourself, visit my website at:

www.sardonicpoet.com
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Cheers

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PART 1

60.0.0 Manipulation Is a Given

If love is the compulsion to be happy, why does that certainty degrade? Doubt ensures we always deserve less. My compulsion to be happy can be manipulated largely by these two factors: beauty and insight. For example: I have a weakness to be interesting at all cost so that I can demonstrate my value toward those who arouse my needs. Beauty is a merciless form of communication because it stokes the compulsion to be happy, without the guarantee there will be mutual satisfaction. Beauty manipulates my compulsion to be happy because I do not consent to the sensations that do nothing else but titillate me and provoke intrigue. This, I believe, is why men are compelled to approach beautiful women out of desire to acquire satisfaction. Beauty travels faster than the mind can cope to rein in urges (like a horse’s reaction to danger). If beauty is the hare, insight is the tortoise. In the race between the hare and the tortoise, the hare initially has the advantage, but why does it lose in the end? The hare is so confident, despite losing ground, that it has the audacity to rest based on what is historically proven as a sure thing. A sleeping beauty is no less attractive, but in the context of a race (competing against a tortoise), a beautiful woman appraises a suitor’s worth through the lens beauty endows. If…women have the potential…to be vain, they will…trust beauty as their greatest asset to procure attention and cloak their flaws.

Insight is my defense against the invasiveness of beauty; I do not consent. Women tortured me with their radiance my whole life, and I couldn’t accept that my instinct…and my instinct alone sabotaged my pursuit for satisfaction; there was no one else to blame. Following some traumatic experiences in my life, the hunger for insight soared. Insight is also a merciless form of communication because you must think dangerously to overcome the yearnings that rob you of serenity. I suppose I am a masochist, because my appetite for insight is ludicrous to woo my greatest love: it’s not you. I can only love myself through the affection of others. Women I secretly anoint as muse are destined to drive me mad before my love is reciprocated. That is what makes me a Sardonic Poet…I am addicted to achieving the impossible. I do this by surrendering to my insecurity, and with selfless courage and conviction you, like me, will acquire great wisdom, if you survive. It’s through psychosis that I learned insight will always trump beauty, because to someone like me…age is a friend. Insight improves over time, while beauty does not; according to biology, beauty has a shorter shelf life.

I admit I am completely divorced from a body I will never accept. Housing a heart that beats exclusively for those who guarantee my reward will be satisfaction (should I take the risk). Do I take the risk of questioning doubt’s agenda? Last I checked, doubt knows we always deserve less; even when you conquer doubt, it plans your decisions will seed future calamities. Whether you manipulate others through beauty or insight, there’s no guarantee of what either approach will accomplish, but ask yourself, what outcome leaves you most satisfied?
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Avoiding risk or avoiding regret.

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How well do you avoid regret? For most of my life, avoiding the sting of rejection mandated I avoid risk at all cost. Doubt ensured I perceived my pursuit for satisfaction as unobtainable. Thinking objectively, the only conclusion I can come to benefit from is to exercise risk and avoid regret. Satisfaction is obtainable if I avoid regret. Manipulation is like gambling on which outcome will be most satisfying. I may manipulate you with my insight, and you may manipulate me with your beauty; as long as we leave each other satisfied, I won’t mind. Love is the compulsion to be happy, so why does that certainty degrade? Doubt ensures we always deserve less, so conquer your doubt by exercising risk and avoiding regret.
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61.0.0 Celebrity Makes False Prophets

Hey, are you a false prophet without representation? Not sure of yourself? Check out the symptoms.
  • Ego
What is celebrity? A celebrity is a famous person or the state of being well known. Why do we crave celebrity? We can only love ourselves through the affection of others. Why? We take love unconditionally. Is celebrity intrinsically evil? It’s commonly associated with narcissism, but I’m not sure I could call it evil. Celebrity is a platform to interface with a large group of strangers. Fans and critics are infatuated with the escapism celebrity serves by people who appear to exemplify moral fiber. This is why celebrity creates false prophets; they take our love unconditionally. Celebrities want to be your savior, and their fans want their celebrity to be their savior.

I think the difference between Jesus and today’s celebrities is Jesus gave love unconditionally, while celebrities take love unconditionally. Celebrity is isolating, because ironically, it’s a shallow enterprise. People fall in love with complete strangers all the time, which means the compulsion to be happy requires little to no substance to be triggered. I want to use the analogy of reeling in a fish. Ego is the fisherman, but on the other end of the line there’s no hook (ego doesn’t need it), because the fish are simply biting down on the line, refusing to let go. Why? We damn ourselves with cognitive negligence. There is no hook, just your compulsion to bite (which is stupid). Your destiny of being the second coming of Christ is the bait. Do you know how insane you have to be to admit to yourself you are th’uh Jesus Christ? I do.

Is celebrity intrinsically evil? Billy Graham was an American evangelist and a prominent Christian figure. Celebrity is a platform for false prophets to peddle their narcissism, so Billy had to resist ego, yes? It’s impossible to resist ego, and if you think otherwise, know that you are not Jesus. That’s not going to stop you from trying to achieve your dreams, because you are addicted to achieving the impossible. You may be a Sardonic Poet like me. You may be a shy narcissist because you are your own fanatic, and a fan wants their celebrity to be their savior. You are mapping ego out with your mythology, and by doing so, you are convincing yourself what you preach is holy. Guilty as charged.
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Maybe you have one fan; maybe you have twenty or two hundred. You are a celebrity (to the dozens that adore you), which makes you a false prophet in training. Humans, for better or worse, are allergic to rejection, so they strive to be perfect to avoid rejection at all cost. Even Jesus was rejected. Rejection is a reminder you are not perfect, and that shy narcissist inside you doesn’t want you to abandon your delusions and adapt to reality. Ego wants you invested in your tiny little destiny at all cost to your soul. 
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62.0.0 Passion Is Just Work in Disguise

Me: Work sucks.

You: Agreed.

Me: Marriage is work.

You: And it sucks.

A fruitless endeavor is the cerebral snap that unveils the turgid reality of your deepest relationships. It’s a fruitless endeavor, and your only options are to leave...or adjust your expectations. I opted to adjust my expectations when my will snapped (twice). My will is now set to “adjust my expectations.” I can’t leave my job or my wife; I simply “adjust” until my life is palatable (cue medication). Are things getting worse in your job? Don’t leave, don’t make amends, don’t change yourself, just adjust your expectations to accommodate for the sour absence of enthusiasm, spirit, and zeal. Your passion is now hibernating until a circumstance merits its participation.

Choose: Leave and evacuate boredom or stay and adjust your expectations. Work snapped my will like a twig, and now I have no more passion for my job. My wife snapped my will like a twig, and now I have no passion for my marriage; it’s just...work (and it sucks). That is when I learned about passion. It is simply work in disguise. You never loved your work; your passion simply numbed the listlessness like a sedative. Originally, you lusted your job (not loved), just like you lusted for your spouse (when you first met), but now you realize the work you lusted after was never not tedious.
Remember, you are not giving up. You are simply adjusting your expectations to accommodate for the sour absence of enthusiasm, spirit, and zeal (cue medication).

Work to live, live to work. That sounds like someone who has a passion...to stay busy. What happens when you don’t stay busy? When you evacuate boredom, you entertain fruitless endeavors like marital affairs or starting your own business. When your will is broken and you can’t stand “it” anymore, you learn there is no such thing as hope. Hope just grows like a weed, so an abundance of anything resembling determination is no guarantee your endeavor will ever bear fruit. Hope grows even when the opportunity to succeed has clearly vanished; it’s bloody incorrigible (I know from experience). A passion to stay busy is still a passion, if it’s just a job you do to survive—unless you have a passion for other people’s charity (please spare some change).
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So you decide to stay married and employed. Choose: Leave and evacuate boredom or stay and adjust your expectations. Will itself wouldn’t break without a grand design behind its fragility. Here it is: you can watch the world burn...as long as you have a partner. That’s right, you hold hands with your spouse or your boss, content to watch everyone else’s expectations crackle, pop, and spit under the heat of their fruitless endeavors (pssst...makes for good gossip too). I’m not writing so much as I’m auditing helpful suggestions. My thoughts are not my own; I listen through whistling lips. I said this because for me writing is a fruitless endeavor, even though I enjoy it; it’s not work to me (and it certainly doesn’t pay). 
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That’s why I’m following my passion to be a writer, “hoping” it will bring me satisfaction in my life. Oooh, I think I felt some zeal. The purpose of a fruitless endeavor is to understand both sides of the “work” equation: leave and evacuate boredom or stay and adjust your expectations. Marriage is work, work is work, passion is work in disguise (and it sucks). When your will snaps, like mine did (in my job and in my marriage), know that passion has no incentive to reappear, unless you have the will to starve doing what you lust for (not love). Why lust? You know why. You have to starve, because when you follow your passions, chances are you can’t afford to eat. Passion is work in disguise, but it’s not a fruitless endeavor if it reminds you that you are loveable and talented at something to somebody.

Remember...hope is incorrigible, so I’m just going to adjust my expectations perpetually and hope for the best (cue alcohol).
If you want to know what the will to starve means, visit www.sardonicpoet.com and check out what I have to offer.
You: Speak for yourself, I love my job and adore my partner.

Me: You haven’t had these types of conversations in your head?

You: Well, if I did, I wouldn’t share them publically.

Me: You know why?

You: Why?

Me: People relish penalty.

You: What does that mean?
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Me: Keep reading my articles to find out. 
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63.0.0 Satisfaction Is Not a Right

Do what comes naturally…unless it offends someone. If you don’t accommodate for people who are offended by your opinions, that means a suspicion of bias is evoked. What if being offended was a gift that comes naturally to you? Doesn’t that mean you are more likely to encounter bias organically through suspicion? Who does a preconceived opinion best cater to? The source. Evidence and truth are ineffective at conveying reality, because people are too busy ignoring the possibility their opinions may be flawed (when challenged). Bias exists to challenge an “unfair” advantage. Life is unfair…so all advantages have bias (it comes naturally).

Do what comes naturally…unless if offends someone. Is that someone you offended a family member, a friend, a colleague? No. Then why do you care if they are offended? Why…you’re “hoping” to engage obedient consumers. Independent of bias, prejudice, and preconceived opinions, your biology has concrete benefits and disadvantages that are financially palatable. Hierarchy is a consequence of bias. Why? Keep reading. Bias will be exploited by interested parties to control and censor, not free speech, but inconvenient speech. Free speech is allowed to be inaccurate…inconvenient speech cannot afford to be based on a mistaken belief. Why? People relish penalty. Once it’s clear to the public you censor inconvenient speech, you are irrelevant (to potential consumers).

I think people lose sight of the purpose of accusing someone of bias: Satisfaction is not a right. But if denial comes naturally to you, the only way you may accomplish your goal is to censor inconvenient speech. When you censor inconvenient speech, you are irrelevant (to investors). Maybe that’s a cruel irony. Maybe your outrage only strengthens the bias you protest. Life is not fair, because satisfaction is not a right. Being offended (like free speech) is allowed to be inaccurate. When denial comes to mind, ignoring the possibility your opinions are in fact wrong (when challenged), you may prefer to censor inconvenient speech. Bias exists to challenge an “unfair”…advantage, who gets to decide what is not fair? No one. Life is not fair, because satisfaction is not a right.
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To be offended even by the suspicion of bias comes naturally to those who resort to censoring inconvenient speech. 
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64.0.0 Stigma Is a Necessary Convenience

 
Definition of Stigma: A mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person.

I cannot compromise my health anymore on fruitless endeavors. Ironically, stigma says more about the people (in abundance) who shun the disgraced. I am drawn to strangers’ opinions. They presume their thoughts are private. They are not. Stigma is a disjunction that requires a distressing amount of delicacy to secure a bond (of trust). Why? Your silence is evidence of our mutual insanity. What’s that mean? For example: the moments when you share awkward silence between two or more people (having registered the presence of stigma) only confirms your inability to understand and share the feelings of those who are stigmatized. Why? The growing passage of time infers your approval of the stigma (the longer you take to commit to a response). Then, your silence is evidence of our mutual insanity, so quickly survey the crowd and prepare to go with the flow. Stigma says more about the people (in abundance) who shun the disgraced. Maybe it’s not ironic after all.

The more transparent I am about my mental illness, the less employable I become thanks to the stigma people shun (plus I’m a dick). That’s ironic in an age that panders to every delusional personality that claims their identity generates publicity; guilty as charged. In psychosis, my mind was raped by an inexplicable phenomenon for three days straight, and while I enjoyed the insight, I was ignorant to the consequences (i.e., brain damage). I was hospitalized in a psych ward for a month with people who were clearly not sane (I made a few friends). Listening to the sound of slippers shuffling across the floor, I took the time to see why I needed to be broken. Now I simply say whatever needs to be said without the stigma of shame. Go ahead, shun me if that’s what you need to do. I have a cerebral lust (not love) for contemplation, and I will never compromise my brain again for fruitless endeavors.

In 2008, I was amongst the top 1% employees of the largest bank in Canada, and now…I’m just a window into your misfortune. I am not intelligent, which is not something you want a potential hire to admit, but intelligence is a spectrum haunted by stigma. Imagine all the stories of people you’ve admired who bore the brunt of ridicule, believing their stigma could one day be accepted by common folk. Know that your personality is not a disease; you’re just in the wrong environment, like a fish out of water growing lungs to survive in the atmosphere. Now you don’t have a home because you can’t contribute anything on land, and you can’t breathe underwater. You have become a mutation, and for me that is the stigma I tackle. Sharing this obviously makes me unemployable, but I’m making it my mission to break all stigmas (even the sinister), if only to prove my point: stigma is a necessary convenience.
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What about pedophiles, rapists, and killers; what about those stigmas? Unfortunately, stigma is obliged to be sinister. Stigma says more about the people who shun the disgraced because they prefer to revel in other people’s penalty. Well, you might say, “Sardonic, you can’t rehabilitate these ‘people,’” so the stigma is warranted for a reason...to haunt them with shame. So basically it’s up to the law to catch and force criminals to confess after…a crime has been committed. Ironically, these people you shun trust…in your cowardice and hypocrisy to operate undetected for as long as they do. Why? Where was your empathy when someone else needed it? Is your insanity not mutual? Would you rather empathize with a person if …there was a chance your empathy could persuade them to choose an outlet that wasn’t criminal? Imagine if Alcoholics Anonymous didn’t exist—how many more repeat offenders there would be for vice-related offenses? Or do you prefer to wait for someone to be abused or murdered before you rush to share your burden via Facebook? Follow my logic: if…these people cannot be rehabilitated, why enact justice after…a victim’s life has been destroyed? We have to SNAP
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 stigma like a twig so people can empathize with potential offenders before they slink into the dark. I bet stigma is looking better and better the further you read this; I think for common folk, stigma is a necessary convenience.

Is your silence evidence of our mutual insanity? No? I look forward to responding to your feedback. Stigma says more about the people who shun the disgraced, because people REVEL in other people’s penalty. Why? To have empathy for somebody means the ability to understand and share the feelings of another like…a potential pedophile, rapist, and murder. The irony is, these categories of people you shun trust…in your cowardice and hypocrisy to operate undetected, because no one is above evil. What incentive is there to break their silence when even a false allegation can destroy an innocent person’s life? It’s arithmetic; these people will continue to operate undetected until common folk decide to snap the stigma (even if it’s sinister). Breaking stigma is not a fruitless endeavor, so I will commit myself to this task until it snaps like a twig. Stigma doesn’t prevent crime; it…it…makes compassion inconvenient. I’m bipolar, and I’m trying to break stigma, if only to show why it is a necessary convenience. Stigma says more about the people who shun the disgraced because they revel in other people’s penalty. Why? Everyone thinks they’re above evil (which makes you an even bigger hypocrite for not empathizing). Get it? Is your silence evidence of our mutual insanity? No? I look forward to responding to your feedback. I am drawn to strangers’ opinions, which presume their thoughts are private. They are not.

Let me break this down in point form:
  • Intelligence is a spectrum haunted by stigma.
  • Know that your personality is not a disease; you’re just in the wrong environment.
  • Stigma says more about the people who shun the disgraced, because they prefer to revel in other people’s penalty.
  • Ironically, these people you shun trust in your cowardice and hypocrisy to operate undetected.
  • For common folk, stigma may be a necessary convenience.
  • Stigma makes giving compassion inconvenient.
  • Everyone thinks they’re above evil (which makes you an even bigger hypocrite for not empathizing).
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I say what needs to be said. I may be a hypocrite, but I’m no coward. Visit me at my website: www.sardonicpoet.com
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65.0.0 I Think Boredom is Very Interesting

The mind has access to infinity, and curiosity is indifferent to our wellbeing. What’s more curious than a myth? It generates intrigue and fear. I think the world’s biggest problem is boredom…there’s not enough of it. Everyone drinks curiosity’s brew because no one wants to be bored. Why? It’s the plague of amusement. Boredom is curiosity’s aphrodisiac, and this is why people have an instinct to pursue intrigue and fear. I think boredom is the plague of amusement because it controls our tolerance for curiosity. I will attempt to make my point through an analogy to explain how boredom impacts our appetite to pursue and defend our beliefs.

Imagine there are two sides: one side doesn’t want to be right (out of fear), while the other side doesn’t want to be wrong (out of intrigue). The side that doesn’t want to be right shall be labeled “Brakes” (like in a car). The side that doesn’t want to be wrong shall be labeled “Accelerators” (like in a car). Brakes are afraid to be correct, while accelerators are afraid to be incorrect. Brakes don’t want to be correct, because their sole purpose is to predict misfortune. Accelerators don’t want to be incorrect because their sole purpose is to predict stagnation. Brakes always think they’re heading toward a cliff (hence the fear). Accelerators always think they’re heading toward a myth (hence the intrigue). Wait, you ask…aren’t Accelerators always leaving boredom behind? No, because Brakes think the myth that intrigues accelerators is actually a cliff, and Accelerators think this dreaded cliff is a myth that can be exposed to strike fear into their foe (brakes).

What happens when you apply the brakes and accelerator at the same time? Wasted energy. One side has to disengage, but how much for how long? Both sides agree they can neither stagnate nor crash. What happens if you crash? Well…physical, emotional, and financial trauma? What happens if you stagnate? *shrugs* Boredom. That’s it? Boredom is the plague of amusement. If Accelerators think that the Brakes fear a myth…why shouldn’t Brakes believe that the Accelerators’ beliefs are also a myth? I think it’s a good question; if the cliff is a myth, then boredom shall also qualify as a myth.

Can boredom be a myth? Turns out that is a stupid question, but indulge me. A myth is a widely held false belief or idea. Is boredom a false belief? How do Accelerators solve stagnation? They accelerate. How quickly? As fast as it takes. Brakes want to engage because the Accelerator’s intrigue is frightening. If brakes engage, it will strike panic into the Accelerators, because they are now heading toward STAGNATION. This is the key ingredient why I believe boredom is a myth. When both Accelerators and Brakes engage, they create a terrible amount of wasted energy. Boredom is a myth to Brakes (oh look…those Accelerators are bored again) and the cliff is a myth to Accelerators (good God, Brakes are boring).
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Accelerators’ tolerance for curiosity (regarding an intriguing myth) peaks when Brakes endure the prospect of fear. Now there’s a reason to be curious. What you fear, your foes will cheer. Suddenly I’m not bored anymore. I’ll live to expose…what my foe fears, before my foes expose…what I fear. The mind has access to infinity, and curiosity is indifferent to our wellbeing (i.e., peace). What’s more curious than a myth? It generates intrigue and fear. I think the world’s biggest problem is boredom…there’s not enough of it. Everyone drinks curiosity’s brew because no one wants to be bored. Why? It’s the plague of amusement. Boredom is curiosity’s aphrodisiac, and this is why people have an instinct to pursue intrigue and fear. I think boredom is the plague of amusement because it controls our tolerance for curiosity. Isn’t that interesting?
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66.0.0 Be Empty

I think this pursuit of pleasure is making me miserable. How? I have a suspicion that society views satisfaction as a right. The problem with that is we learn to regard satisfaction as our destiny; it’s coming to us. I’ll use a metaphor to explain.
What’s the solution to your misery? Be empty. To me, emptiness is just another way of saying “I lack substance.” Imagine yourself in the middle of the ocean, with sunshine and blue skies. The boat you’re sitting in has a paper cup. The cup represents your vice. The way people tend to treat emptiness is through consumption. Why can’t I be satisfied with emptiness? Is pleasure acquired through the transition from one state to the next (i.e., scooping, pouring, filling, thrusting, purging)?

Another way to say consumption is the using up of a resource; in this metaphor, the ocean (like pleasure) is a tremendous resource. The pursuit of pleasure lives in the transition from and to emptiness. When you feel empty (and you lack substance), your instinct is to take the paper cup, dip it in the ocean, and pour the contents into your boat.

My vice (eating) is just a cup, and the ocean water is pleasure. Growing up, I never learned to be satisfied with emptiness. Instead, now, before I feel empty, I eat (even when I’m not hungry). The goal of pleasure is to distract us from our emptiness (through consumption). I think the key to my misery is being satisfied with emptiness (that is our right). What’s going to happen if I keep pouring ocean water into my boat? I will sink. I can’t fit the ocean in my boat, but that won’t stop me from trying, because transition feeeeels good. Gee, I better buy a bigger boat.

I do not want to drown in pleasure, because I will die. How do I stop that from happening? I must realize that the pursuit of pleasure is making me miserable. Remember…the pursuit of pleasure lives in the transition from and to emptiness. I must pick up the cup and scoop the ocean water out of my boat to make progress. Be empty and be satisfied without the advantages of substance. Advantages—what advantages? Emptiness keeps you afloat. How do I become empty when I have access to a tremendous resource like pleasure? The pursuit of pleasure is also the transition from and to satisfaction. Now, when I feel empty, I want to take the paper cup, dip it in the boat, and pour the contents back into the ocean. My boat is full of substance, so I must purge.
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I think this pursuit of pleasure is making me miserable. How? I have a suspicion society views satisfaction as a right. The problem with that is we learn to regard satisfaction as our destiny; it’s coming to us. Another way to say consumption is the using up of a resource; in this metaphor the ocean (like pleasure) is a tremendous resource. The goal of pleasure is to distract us from our emptiness (through consumption). As long as my response to emptiness is consumption, I will be doomed to drown in pleasure. Unbeknownst to you, your true destiny serves only to distract you from emptiness, not satisfy your emptiness. If you satisfy your emptiness…you will drown
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67.0.0 Follow the Value

Why does a baby cry? It wants to be distracted from its emptiness. Without emptiness, amusement would be a bore. This is why repetition suggests that amusement is constantly losing its appeal. Why? Unbeknownst to you, your destiny serves only to distract you from your emptiness, not fill it with your personal achievements (that won’t work). Accelerating this repetition only helps to distract from your emptiness less and less as amusement continues its decline. Why? Pleasure is acquired through the transition from one stationary state to the next; that momentum spurs the cycle of consumption to grow without improvement. Why? Boredom is the plague of amusement. All addictions are doing is exercising their host’s instinct to distract (from their emptiness) through satisfaction (it’s not a right). The reality is there is no filling your emptiness, because you’re not supposed to.

How do we distract ourselves from emptiness? We follow the value. We follow the value, whether it’s sinister or divine. In every definition of the word value, what “follow the value” means is pursue anything that “satisfies” my emptiness. I will repeat, you can never satisfy your emptiness; you can only distract yourself from it. Celebrity is not fulfilling. At best, it’s just a great distraction. Your emptiness remains unphased by your pursuits. Only the mouth of your understanding grows and shrinks in reaction to your struggle (like a pupil). The only thing you can do is become satisfied with your emptiness. When I get cravings to eat or masturbate, I know now that I am not satisfied with my emptiness. Without emptiness, eating would be a bore. Securing what value I follow depends on how well it can distract me from my emptiness. I see the value in that.
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Who follows the value? Everyone. This is because data is predicted, captured, appraised, and exploited by megalomaniacs to produce results quicker than their competition. If ‘know your enemy’ is sage advice, ‘know your fool’ is bait. What is the bait that even a megalomaniac would bite? Attention. Attention in how the people who distract you make money (i.e., Hollywood). Is their competition hostile? Who is best at inciting fear? Some people make a living opposing the value of distraction (like motivational speakers) because people like them realize that reality is so obvious, it’s imperceptible. Question: are frightened people bored? I truly believe that boredom is the silent threat to mankind, not Russia or Islam or Trump.

Everyone has an addiction they must control, and by using the Internet to escape boredom through fear of their emptiness, the value of intrigue soars. Intrigue of the unknown opposes the value of fear. Value…trust me…run away from it. Why? If your data will help predict where value is going to be, it will never be erased. Why? Leverage. History is being recorded objectively (in the dark) independently from political correctness to accurately predict where the value has been and will be. History can be controlled through nostalgia to groom the consumers of tomorrow (i.e., Nintendo). If you seek attention, you are a bored fool; that makes you marketable. Marketers depend on your boredom to make money. How are you going to pay for it? Give away your data.

www.sardonicpoet.com
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68.0.0 Emptiness Is Your God

Everything you do is to distract yourself from your emptiness. Having a baby? Distraction. Politics? Distraction. Love? Distraction. Sex? Distraction. Eating? Distraction. Work? Distraction. Breathing? Distraction. Addiction? Distraction. Do you accept emptiness as your god? Emptiness is a man-made invention to control people; it doesn’t exist. Emptiness is for simple-minded fools who are too afraid to question their beliefs. There is literally no such thing as emptiness, yet everything people do is to distract them from this lie. Emptiness does not react to your presence, unless you count “nothing” as a reaction. That tells me that we need a reaction from emptiness to feel value. Why?

Emptiness NEVER gives us attention…so does that help explain why we want to be distracted from it? Ultimately, we need attention because it’s the best form of distraction (from our emptiness). Why? We can only accept ourselves through the affection of others. Without attention, your worth does not equal value. Why? You believe you are empty. We can demonstrate our value in the hope it draws attention, which begins the cycle:
 
Note: “>” equals impatience
 
Attention > amusement > boredom > hunger > emptiness > repeat
 
So we want to do it again and again. Why? I can only guess. What happens when we resist the hunger for amusement? We get bored. How long can we tolerate our boredom? Until we feel empty. How long can we tolerate our emptiness? Depends on how empty we are. The moment we cave in to temptation is when we ultimately lose sight of the consequences. Do we believe in emptiness? I believe it’s responsible for everything we do. By reacting to “nothing,” we acknowledge our faith in something that doesn’t exist will eventually give us the attention we need (never going to happen). Emptiness is our god; a man-made invention to control people. It doesn’t exist. I can prove it.

There are two types of addiction: mutiny and charity. Your addiction is a charity when you give something you don’t have, and your charity is an addiction when you take something you don’t need (like a CEO accepting welfare). Charity is a distraction from your emptiness, that’s all it is. Why does your god refuse to confirm he exists? We didn’t volunteer to exist; we were drafted. That’s why addiction is mutiny. You resent pain, so you do anything to avoid it (even if it kills you). Emptiness is your fruitless womb, and nothing you do will seed it. Everything you do is a reaction to the emptiness you do not accept will never change. You are literally vilifying…nothing. Emptiness doesn’t suck or swallow your maladies; if emptiness was a thing (which it isn’t), it’s innocent.

Emptiness is a construct of the imagination that is incapable of accepting its value to be less than whole. What makes you whole? If you insist on believing in the concept of emptiness, don’t try to fill it; there’s no point. You are not a jar to fill. You are not a jar. Instead assign the hunger for amusement to be the distraction from your emptiness. The sensation of your hunger signals your belief in emptiness is fading if…you do not lose sight of the consequences. Indulgence carries consequences…it’s not worth it. If you claim your belief makes you whole, you have to demonstrate it works, otherwise to the rest of the world your worth does not equal value.
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Everything you do is to distract yourself from your emptiness. Having a baby? Distraction. Politics? Distraction. Love? Distraction. Sex? Distraction. Eating? Distraction. Work? Distraction. Breathing? Distraction. Addiction? Distraction. Do you accept emptiness as your god? Emptiness is a man-made 
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invention to control people; it doesn’t exist. Emptiness is for simple-minded fools who are too afraid to question their beliefs. There is literally no such thing as emptiness, yet everything people do is to distract them from this lie. Emptiness does not react to your presence, unless you count “nothing” as a reaction. That tells me that we need a reaction from emptiness to feel value. Why?
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The show must go on.
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69.0.0 I'll Accept the Blame

In Canada, the House of Commons is where political groups debate policies. If no one concedes when they are wrong, I don’t see the value in staging a debate. Imagine if integrity…was what won elections, how would the elected officials do their job differently? If integrity was what people truly value in a leader (whoever that is), be prepared to do one thing: accept the blame. If integrity got politicians elected, it’s in the elected official’s best interest to accept the blame. Why? No one is perfect, and I think a flawless public record would arouse suspicion amongst their detractors (justifiably). Accepting the blame brings closure to the population. It’s a reflection of strength and trust in the voters who claim to value integrity. Then, in turn, the responsibility shifts onto the voters. If integrity is so important, voters must reciprocate the value of integrity with forgiveness to avoid being hypocrites.

We hold our politicians to higher standards…so does that mean the population enjoys less scrutiny to authenticate their integrity? I think the voters need scrutiny. Voters are hypocrites who breed hypocrites that elect hypocrites to wage war against hypocrites who breed hypocrites. When is it the voter’s time to take the blame? If the scrutiny of the press held every voter accountable, what do you think the result would be? No one is perfect. Voters are not held to a higher standard, so if you pick a terrible leader, there’s no inquiry to fear. If voters valued integrity, they themselves would accept the blame. I accept the blame for this…because I voted for a terrible leader. Terrible leaders don’t accept the blame for their actions. You want to know what I do accept?

Being white. I looove being white because…as a Sardonic Poet, I realize I no longer need to apologize for the color of my skin. What does being white have to do with accepting the blame? That’s a really good question. What if whites accepted the blame for things they’re accused of out of guilt? What guilt? *shrugs* Whites are treated…as if they are the dominant race. Dominant in what? Hey, that’s up to YOU to decide. Question is…how do you respond to dominant traits of a white person? Fear? Envy? Adoration? Jealousy? Contempt? Disgust? Disinterest? White people accept the blame for things they’re accused of out of an obscure guilt. However, as a white person such as myself, I do not accept the blame you assign me, so I have no guilt. Why? I don’t trust hypocrites to know what integrity means. Will you now accept the blame for your punctually covert discrimination from earlier? Hypocrites never come forward. You don’t like what I have to say? Well, if you value integrity, I guess you have to forgive me.
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Who doesn’t accept the blame because they are never scrutinized? Voters. If voters valued integrity, they would hold themselves accountable. Hypocrites. We elect politicians to maneuver around obstacles that get in the way of their “spotless” integrity; and by extension YOUR integrity. You know what else is spotless? If elects never accept the blame…voters are not held accountable. If voters are not held accountable…they do not accept the blame. Deny, deny, double-down, fake news, Nazi, racist, rapist, pedophile etc. Hold on, back up…what does being white have to do with this? I don’t accept the blame you assign me. Well, aren’t you a hypocrite for not accepting the blame you are accused of? I can’t control how you react to dominant traits. See how I maneuver around the obstacle that gets in the way of my integrity? Just like politicians. Do politicians exhibit dominant traits? You know why leaders manage to sleep at night…they don’t accept the blame we assign them. Do you want to be held accountable, voter? Yes? Okay. If you voted, for example, for Justin Trudeau…you’re a wealthy reflection of poor judgment.
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70.0.0 Hunger Takes on Many Forms

Value is not dependent on the attention you receive from other people. However, I’m afraid to confirm your worst dreams are indeed true: you are empty…so the best thing you can do is just accept that. Do you have an incurable hunger for attention? Let’s kill it. I have a cerebral lust for contemplation, so the amount of attention I presume will make me whole is FUCKING IMPOSSIBLE to achieve. No one reads my work and… my only fan is my editor and I have to pay him to read it. So it occurred to me if I can’t grow a devoted following…I may have more success killing my desire for attention. How do you do that? You play chicken with your hunger. Emptiness is a construct of the imagination that is incapable of accepting its value to be less than whole. What fills that value? Nothing. Hunger responds to the cues of unfulfillment and seduces you into believing it can make you whole without consequences. Being obedient to your hunger means consumption is the only thing allowed to make you happy.

I started fasting recently, and so far in the last three weeks I’ve lost 33 lbs (with no exercise). I ignored my hunger long enough that it vanished (it was too chicken). I live on less than 700 calories a day, and surprisingly, I am content. I’m getting satisfaction by ignoring my hunger; think of hunger like it’s a stranger trying to exploit you for their own amusement. Value is not dependent on other people’s attention; it’s dependent on our lack of fulfillment. If boredom is the plague of amusement, lack of fulfillment is the dog whistle that stings the ears of fantasizers; this is the prelude of a false profit. Nothing will fill you without consequences, and consumption only makes it worse. You are a slave to your hunger because you give it your undivided attention; it’s like you’re trying to impress a stranger (with your appetite) for their amusement. Do you see what I’m thinking? Your mind controls your hunger, and that’s why it always knows what you want. You have to make that switch in your head work by saying to yourself, “I must stop giving my hunger attention.” If you give in first, you’re a chicken.
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I’m not suggesting you stop giving attention to others; be merry with your attention. I’m not suggesting you feel regret for receiving attention; be humble. Unfortunately, for most of us amusement…is…survival; other people’s attention is a curious strategy because you hinge your worth on exploitation. Nothing is going to fill the void, and that pursuit only makes you obedient to your hunger. Hunger should be about survival, not amusement. It’s about being content with boredom, emptiness, and lack of fulfillment. Look…I’m not hungry anymore, I mean…I eat my meal, but it’s not like I’m ravenous. I no longer give my hunger attention, so it…has simply given up. Stop giving your hunger attention. That’s how you kill it. Be merciless. I’ve done this with my diet, and eventually I plan to do this with other bad habits. 
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71.0.0 Love Alone Is Not Moral

There isn’t much to discuss when you realize that love is something you can rise above. How do you rise above love? Embrace morality. Which morality? An inconvenient one. Imagination (like love) is a distraction from your emptiness. While morality strictly concerns itself with your behavior, love behaves like a selfish cunt wanting to love itself at your expense. Adultery, rape, incest, bestiality, pedophilia are just some examples of love’s “exuberance.” Like a flame that gives no heat, you imagine the warmth to delude yourself. Love alone is not moral. Why does love have such a wide appeal? I’m very suspicious of this “moral” staple; I’m here to put love in its place. Morality tells you what is right or wrong, while love tells you “aye-oh, what’s the difference?” If you think love alone is moral, you are delusional.

I can’t choose who I love? Hmm, I guess that explains adultery. Love is all that matters? I guess when man’s best friend humps your leg, you can return the favor. Love without morality is lust. Love is an astonishing synergy…between contrasting personalities. Male and female offer natural contrasts that both excite and repel; ethnic contrasts do the same. Love is a mountain you can’t climb down. Then why choose to climb up the mountain? When you believe someone loves you, death is just an inconvenience. Now morality is no longer accessible to rein in love’s madness. You want to be distracted from your morality, and love does this very well; love is allll that matters *rolleyes*. Which type of morality do lovers choose most often? A convenient one. When morality stands in the way of your delusion, you fight back; you may even draw blood.
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To rise above love, you have to put it in its place. Hate? Rise above it. Fear? Rise above it. Love? If love hurts so badly, why not rise above it. What’s the logic for love to hurt? It reminds you to stay in love, or it reminds you never to fall in love again. Love, hate, and fear, ay-oh, what’s the difference; they don’t care about your wellbeing, so rise above them. HOW? Understand that love is just a hunger for distraction; it has nothing to do with nourishment. You are afraid to be hurt, so you cling to distraction (through nostalgia) or run away from distraction (through an inconvenient morality); either way, you are retreating from pain. Love doesn’t give a shit about you — morality does. The hunger ONLY works…when you give in to temptation; love is temporary, consequence is not. If you don’t give in to temptation, you give morality time to reel love in and put it in its place. 
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72.0.0 I'm the Puzzle

Twelve people circle an elephant. They all agree they are looking at an elephant. Each person circling the elephant sees a different perspective, which is…unique. This analogy illustrates that everyone’s perspective is believed to be valuable because it is unique. I have a different take on this analogy: What if the elephant was a sphere? Now all twelve persons would share the same perspective. Now what does the sphere represent? The answer. How do the twelve people respond to the same answer? Each person is a puzzle, a unique puzzle, yet the answer is NEVER unique. Never. Is that a good thing? For some people, sure. Is it a bad thing? For some people, sure. No one’s puzzle can change the answer, because the answer is unimpressionable.
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Is the sphere emptiness? Is the sphere God? Is the sphere earth? Is it all of the above? That is entirely based on you, because you are the puzzle, not the answer. Uniqueness’s appeal unfolds because everyone (in the example above) believes uniqueness has more value than the sphere. Why? The further away from the answer you travel (which is not unique), the more the answer loses its appeal. Why would someone prefer to retreat from truth’s appeal? Keep reading. Uniqueness (like the answer) means you too…are unimpressionable. You are a sperm that retreats from the egg because you are unwilling to accept that the answer is ferociously simple, and nothing you do can change that. Your stupendously unique and complex puzzle that defines you…has a tedious answer. This means “the” truth has no value to those who covet uniqueness; there’s no incentive to be impressionable. Those who do have incentive to accept the truth find camaraderie within a mutual insanity.

Why is uniqueness so valuable when the answer is so simple? The answer NEVER changes, and puzzles require so much effort to create and market. While the answer always reveals itself to be a tedious solution, the puzzle as a result grows more and more intriguing. Get it? Uniqueness is the epitome of an unimpressionable being, because true originality is only designed to titillate yourself. However, if your uniqueness helps others to forget how simple the truth is…there blossoms value. Why? Ironically, everyone desires to be the truth; the thing we want to conquer will bring peace to those under our rule. Case in point:
 
                                                Democrats and Republicans are unimpressionable.
 
The sphere is too bloody simple to exploit; everyone balks at the answer, despite their best efforts to shroud it in mystery (with their puzzle). Who is going to be elected? You can’t have a group of twelve leaders out of twelve. Why? Reality is sooo obvious, it’s imperceptible. If the true leader is simplicity, the leader has no puzzle; the truth is unimpressionable (like my daughter). So if you value logic, there is no choice but to be impressionable.
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My six-year-old daughter is set in her ways, so as a parent she is my answer. My puzzle (as a parent) attempts to change the answer through my desire to control. As a unique puzzle myself, I am unimpressionable (my poor parents). But my puzzle now (as a parent) is faaar too ineffective at convincing my daughter to cooperate. What makes me unique has NO value if my goal is to change the answer (like my daughter’s behavior)…because it’s fucking futile. Remember, I am the puzzle, not the answer. However, if I have no puzzle, I become simplicity itself; like when I experienced psychosis. I don’t want to be a puzzle anymore, because this strategy does not help me raise my daughter (or make a living). Soon I’m going to share my puzzle with you. I believe it equals “the” answer, because that’s what a false prophet would wish. I listen to my answer and presume it knows best. 
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73.0.0 Ask the Director

Do you believe facts are correct? If evidence supports your beliefs, would your faith interest a delusional audience? If no, that suggests facts can be ineffective. I recommend you use propaganda. When you surrender your dignity (as far as addiction takes you), you are essentially justifying your life to a director that refuses to reveal himself. Suspending logic (by any definition) is profoundly absurd, but for most people on this planet, suspending logic is an effective lifestyle (i.e., a voluntary delusion). That’s how you get to heaven. Delusion is our gasoline. The delusional don’t even volunteer to play the roles they play…they were drafted. The director exists without proof, so it’s a privilege to know what the opposition doesn’t. Acting is life, even if you don’t like the role. When does acting begin and surrender end? You surrender to a role you didn’t volunteer for…by a director who refuses to reveal himself; illogical but…necessary. Why? Actors in a way are “holy,” because they are regarded as having a spiritual autonomy. They have to surrender to an idol to succeed, even if the idol is doubt.
 
Earth’s population can be divided into three brands of worship: God, Earth, and Emptiness; granted, there is overlap.
 
33% of the population chooses God
33% of the population chooses Earth
33% of the population chooses Emptiness
 
People that worship God best preserve the instinct to procreate. People that worship Earth best preserve their habitat. People who worship emptiness best preserve solitude. We are all false prophets; even the deities we worship (like Muhammad, Jesus, and Kanye) are false prophets. Every person that has been born on this planet is wired to react to the presence of fear (fear is the absence of information). Fear is our biggest incentive to obey…but what’s our incentive to be feared? We want to be worshiped, although I don’t believe it works as intended. Why? You are a pedophile…who wants to be Jesus. What was that? You want the fame of Jesus to hide the fact you are sexually attracted to underage teens. It’s a hell of a construct. You believe through success, influence, and charity…that worship will bring you closer to a good place. Michael Jackson was a good example of this. Was Michael a pedophile who wanted to be Jesus? Yes…or were his accusers projecting their hypocrisy out of an unconscious fear? Are you keen to endorse my opinion, or would you choose to CRUCIFY me with your hypocritical critique? No? You learn fast. Interesting connection, no? We all want to be Jesus; thanks to celebrity, that’s clear. You know why we all want to be Jesus? To hide the fact we are all pedophiles. That’s the crux of stigma; that’s why stigma teaches communities to avoid scandal (to null the risk of implicating themselves) like selfish cowards and hypocrites.
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Humans worship God (unimpressionable), Earth (impressionable), or Emptiness (neither). I’m going to detach myself from existence and perceive those three for what they are: brands of false prophecy. For the sake of simplicity, I will refer to the three as one with the moniker: “The Director.” Evolution-wise, how has The Director shaped out morality? False prophets are immoral, yet heh… we are perfect in The 
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Director’s eyes (not yours). Why does The Director think false prophets are perfect? We will worship his highness with zeal. God, Earth, and Emptiness are worshipped for the looming fear of doom; The Director covers his bases with a diverse strategy to draft the human population (from where?).  Remember, the doubt is detached from our existence, which unlike you means it is fully autonomous. By listening to doubt, you receive inside knowledge about the putrid quirks of the human mind. Why am I doing this? Simple answers are not simple.

The Director’s capacity to forgive you is to relieve his pain (briefly), and through your pain, you experience a synergy that compels you to pursue relief as well. I believe this is why we’re compelled to surrender when we’re vulnerable. As long as The Director forgives you (when you surrender to him), he remains infallible; what does God know about fallibility? God made you perfect…what do you know about fallibility? Think about how people take advantage of God’s relationship with religious extremism. Then why is it so satisfying to reject The Director? Simple...you resent pain. Why? Surrender is the only option we have between: vanity, voluntary delusion, or addiction. The only free will we have...is what we surrender to…to relieve our pain (which is scripted). Doubt convinces you that you have full spiritual autonomy to make choices (during your life), and that gives YOU the “freedom” from being controlled (which is scripted). Control as you know it is an illusion. It’s perfectly predicted. I predict I am wrong.
 
God is the record that the majority of the population listens to…God is just a record. Earth is just a record. Emptiness is a record. Politics relies on dividing these brands of false prophecy because that’s how they get paid. Who pays them? Whoever benefits from division. Just like a doctor relies on people getting sick to make a living. You want to know why? Do you want to know what fills my belly?
 
                                                                                Your hunger.
 
Imagine a Democrat debating a Republican. The Democrat opens with the statement, “I eat your hunger.” To which then the Republican replies, “Yeah…well I eat your hunger.” What fills their bellies is their opponent’s inability to achieve. You want to know the ironic thing about hunger?
 
                                                                                It would have us starve.
 
Personally, I don’t trust my hunger. How can you trust hunger, when nourishment is not satisfying? Hunger benefits from division. You are playing a game of chicken with your opponent’s hunger. Little do you realize the prize is starvation (hunger would have us starve). This why there is no alignment between God, Earth, and Emptiness. This is why The Director exists: to cull the progress of your ascension. You can ascend above God through doubt, but here’s the truth you don’t want to hear: hell is above and below you. Your potential is morally limited. That’s just the way it is.
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This cycle of misery can spiral, disregarding how little or how much you surrender to The Director. Surrendering to The Director is not a magic bullet that corrects your path prematurely, so the temptation brews (by design) to beseech a liberator (i.e., Doubt); a sinner’s truth is a vain religion. It 
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doesn’t occur to people that The Director scripts your path, no matter how spontaneous or sinister it is. When you surrender to doubt, you ironically become less aware of the deceit. The deceit strikes at will. Again...it doesn’t occur to people that The Director scripts your path, no matter how spontaneous or sinister it is. It only makes it sweeter to reject an authority that requires your allegiance.  It’s baptism by fire, and you are addicted to the doubt. Audacity is your fairytale rebellion.

The irony is...you are also fallible by proxy, because your sin is scripted, which makes you perfect. Well, what does God know about fallibility? God made you perfect…so what do you know about fallibility? When you accept The Director forgives your sin, you become free from craving Doubt’s illusion of free will, because your potential is limited (Doubt has no limits). If we are perfectly unique, and we follow and accept The Director’s path, no matter how sinister it is, are humans divine by proxy? I’ll pray on it… Those of faith and without faith, would you prefer to invest in a delusion? What’s the delusion? Choice. I can PROVE Doubt exists. Your delusion is your inability to understand what truly exists. Do I sound like I know what I’m talking about? Of course not. The Director is truly funny. You are absurd by The Director’s design, yet your life is completely scripted. You...Culture of One...please The Director with your surrender. Stop begging him to be different. I only know what I don’t know. I can prove it.

You can surrender at any point in the script to vanity, voluntary delusion, or addiction. No matter how organic and spontaneous your ideas are, they are long since scripted. It’s difficult to accept your choices are not original, but it is especially difficult to accept how easy surrender is (when torture is involved). If you surrender to vanity, you enjoy the commandments of autonomy, where you bask in your delusions of freedom.

 Do you know what the fine line is between madness and genius? Incentive. Potential is morally limited (by your vanity), so does that mean (in the moment indicated below) I have the incentive to reject morality or follow it? I have the incentive to demonstrate my allegiance to whatever proves to expand my opportunities. Morality is designed to highlight how predictably the mind reacts to rejection. Do I reject morality, or do I follow it (lust is love without morality). Is morality unpalatable if it limits my potential? Is morality palatable if it expands my potential? Whose morality? History is written by the victors (humanity is the victor’s reward), so is it the victor’s morality that is (un)palatable? Potential is morally limited, because without it you would ignore the consequences (which is scripted).
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If I pursue madness, I won’t have any limits holding me back, but if I pursue genius, at least my morality will be palatable. A ‘win at all cost’ attitude highlights how predictably the mind reacts to the threat of rejection: Predictably, we are even critiqued (by hypocrites) on how best we retreat from the threat of rejection. Despite that, you are the worst critic you know. However, if you ignore the mind’s compulsion to retreat from the threat of rejection, eventually you will be numb to failure. That can be a bad and a good thing. Good that you embrace the benefits of that experience, but also bad because well...you lose your incentive to avoid misfortune (to not give a fuck who you help or disappoint).
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If you had to choose an experience between vanity, delusion, and addiction, which would you pick? If you picked vanity, you reject morality. If you picked delusion, you reject reality. If you picked addiction, you reject responsibility. I lust for change.
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74.0.0 The Devil You Know Loves Cowards

What are the advantages of stigma? It provokes predictable behavior. Who benefits from that? The devil you know. Why? You are afraid to confirm your hesitation to change (your behavior) has created a worst-case scenario. So…you stick with the devil you know, because you are a coward. The devil you know LOVES cowards. Where’s the stigma in that? What are the advantages of stigma? It provokes predictable behavior. Who benefits from that? The devil you know. Why? You are afraid to confirm your hesitation to change (your behavior) has created a worst-case scenario. So…you stick with the devil you know because cowards love being exempt from accountability.
 
If I said to you transgenderism is a mental disorder, if you agreed with that statement, would you publically endorse it? No. Why? People are keen to advertise their disgust. Why? Stigma. It’s this attitude that connects us to something (no one can publically endorse), even if they secretly agree with it. That’s the problem. Stigma connects us for a reason:
 
To spare our communities the shame of a scandal.
 
That’s EXACTLY what sexual predators depend on to fulfill their needs with your children. Preceding the event of my psychosis, I convinced myself that a family member was raping my four-year-old daughter. You might think to yourself, did I confront this person? No. The sheer fright of confirming my greatest fear be true…is not the hunch I was correct. The greatest fear is that my hesitation to respond (to my suspicions) is what allowed the rape to occur in the first place. Stigma taught me well.
 
Imagine if I had gone ahead and accused this family member of raping my four-year-old daughter, and I was wrong. Imagine the devastation that mistake would have had on my family. THAT…is why sexual predators depend on our cowardice to enjoy our children sexually. You condone abuse with your cowardice. Why does stigma exist? To spare the community of a scandal. Why? People cannot publically endorse ideas with people who are keen to advertise their disgust. Case and point: Transgenderism. I’m lucky because I don’t have to question my gender. True diversity is truly expressed in the mind, and the body is a consequence of the mind. I don’t have to question my gender…do you resent that? I’ll know for sure when I share my opinions publically.

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75.0.0 Children Are Contraception

Wait, wait…why are we pedophiles? Love alone is not moral; especially parental love. Parental love is fucking ludicrous when it belongs to children. But we are certainly capable of parental love for those without biological connection. For example, biologically, girls can have babies as soon as they start menstruating. That can be as young as eleven years old. So I believe the lust for youth blurs the lines between paternal love and procreation, because there is no genetic connection restricting that unconscious appetite. Why? Experience will always consume innocence, and that innocence is “free-spirited.” Why? Children are treated as if they are contraception. It’s an unconscious appetite that gets satisfied only through the transfer of affection. A definition of affection is: the act or process of affecting or being affected; whether it’s nature’s law or government law, both protect children from unconscious appetites. As a response, the mind concocts “alternative strategies,” like how to address gender. Children are fluid when it comes to affection…not gender. Did you ever want to eat a baby’s cheek? Yes. Then what’s stopping you? Children are contraception. In a way affection can include abuse. 
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76.0.0 There Is No Such Thing as Morality

I believe morality and delusion are one, if not interchangeable. Why do you ask? They can be justified. Is it objectively wrong to kill someone? Yes. What if you walked in on that someone raping your six-year-old daughter? The reaction SPIKES the delusion…that murder can…be justifiable under “certain” circumstances. I think delusion is justifiable because morality is just delusion without consequences; consequences from whom? Reality can justify any consequence. What does one draw from for guidance in this kerfuffle? Justification. Was it a morality-based decision to kill the rapist, or a delusional one? If you doubt The Director exists, doubt will fuel what can be best justified…not what is moral. Justified by whom? A court of law? Public opinion? That’s not morality, it’s popularity. If delusion can be justified…there’s no telling how far morality can be undermined. Whose morality? Ask The Director.
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77.0.0 People Risk Their Lives for Amusement

People (that succumb to delusion) require amusement to justify their lack of morality. Hunger has NOTHING to do with nourishment and everything to do with amusement. Rape is a form of amusement. Is rape immoral, or is amusement immoral? If rape wasn’t amusing, would people do it? If amusement never existed, how many crimes would that eliminate? Obviously, we will never abolish amusement from our prime directive, but I’m trying to highlight that amusement does not equal morality. That morality can be undermined through delusion to justify the consequences of their actions. Those consequences are judged by whom? Doesn’t that affect your decision? Is doubt your Director? What do you doubt? Do you doubt that doubt exists? Is doubt the sphere? Ahhh, if you believe the sphere is doubt, that makes YOU the answer. This is why doubt is never questioned; you want to be the truth. Your Director is doubt.
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78.0.0 Voluntary Delusion

Nothing is voluntary; that’s why it’s a delusion. I hope that makes sense. You worship doubt instead of your Director. Why? You are devil spawn. We all are. Want to know more?
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79.0.0 Incentive is Ironic

When left in the dark, fear is the absence of information. What’s the incentive to face your fears? Why do you want incentive? Do you think incentive will erase your fear? Incentive is not natural. Why do you think kids have no incentive? They’re lazy. Can you be too lazy to be afraid? Fear creates incentive to comply or rebel. As a Sardonic Poet, I want to encourage you to avoid the incentive that depends on your fear to survive. What incentive do you have to worship God? You don’t have any incentive? How ironic. Incentive is a thing that motivates or encourages one to do something. Motivation is to stimulate (someone's) interest in or enthusiasm for doing something. Is it really motivation if you have no choice? Is a rape victim “motivated” to remove her pants at gunpoint? Kinda. Incentive is an unnatural stimulant that makes light of the dark. When left in the dark, fear is the absence of information. What’s the incentive to face your fears? When fear gives you incentive to ignore the consequences (through laziness)? Why do you want something that makes light of the dark? Are you afraid of the dark? I am. 
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80.0.0 Ego Is Uniform

There’s something to be said about being uniform; remaining the same in all cases and at all times; unchanging in form or character. Uniforms are uniform. Why does that matter? Solidarity. Solidarity is uniform. Font is uniform. Can you imagine reading a book where the fOnt constantly fliPPed sentence by sentence? Oh well, you’ll get used to it. That was fast. I’ve made a couple cases how uniformity is beneficial. Where is uniformity not beneficial? I guess that depends on the context. Uniformity can also have a connotation of suppressing diverse thought. What makes humans truly uniform? Their ego. It’s the truest connection you have, because your true God is yourself. Ego is uniform, and of course…ego can suppress diverse thought. Is Ego your Director? It’s sooo easy to worship, though. Where’s the challenge? 
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81.0.0 The Conflict of Control (a guitar is portable, a piano isn't)

My daughter doesn’t do as she’s told, but she hates punishment. My first conclusion was my daughter wants to be in trouble for some reason. Maybe that reason is attention? I asked her why she didn’t do as she was told; she said “I don’t know.” This is a human conflict. I believe she doesn’t want to disappoint herself; more on that later. She’s fine to disappoint me (and her mother), even though my wife and I clearly communicate our disappointment. Disappointment equals [bad] attention. My daughter confirmed she doesn’t like bad attention, so why would she refuse to comply? If she’s not okay with disappointing herself, then why do it at all? I believe she does not comprehend how well failure encourages low expectations. You are guaranteed to learn something from failure, things like knowing when to give up (more on that later). She doesn’t want to disappoint herself (by trying) because there is little incentive to recall past experience. Why? The outcome of her mistakes taught her to lower her expectations to something less…ambitious. You will disagree with your child’s judgment (and as a parent I don’t blame you) but…maybe if you had lowered expectations to begin with, your child would deserve some [good] attention.

That helps a bit to understand the conflict between my daughter and I, but what about me? Parenting grants me the freedom to control. If freedom is a child’s ultimate incentive, control is a parent’s ultimate freedom. Both sides want freedom differently, and that sparks the conflict of control. Everyone with high expectations hinges their freedom on your cooperation. Who’s in control? No one, so freedom NEVER cooperates. Ironically, that is true freedom. There is no control because all sides have an insensible expectation of what constitutes their freedom (like your truth). For my daughter, freedom is the ultimate incentive, so she can do whatever the hell she wants. For me, control is the ultimate freedom, so I can dictate whatever is allowed to occur in the household (for my peace of mind). Without consensus, freedom doesn’t meet anyone’s expectations without the luxury of a compromise. Hot tip, asshole: lower your expectations. I know you don’t want to disappoint yourself, but ignore what the public says about the reputation of those who give up. It’s that kind of monotone enthusiasm I’m trying to help you avoid that literally gave me brain damage. A “no quit” attitude ignores the warning signs of insensible expectations, to neglect the consequences of your obsession by controlling others through impatience.
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I asked my daughter, would you rather learn from my mistakes or your mistakes. My daughter replied, “My mistakes.” Why? “I’m me.” Why did she choose her mistakes? Daddy has higher expectations. Well then…now I’m interested to learn about people with lower standards, particularly those my daughter interacts with. She doesn’t want to disappoint them, but it’s okay to disappoint me? I should call my mother. I think a mistake has two paths: learn to give up…or learn. I suggest you learn how to give up, so in the future you know when to quit (unless you like brain damage). If you never give up, it’s because you suck at quitting (that’s not something to be proud of). What is the answer? Did you forget it? This is a human conflict. My daughter cares for others with lower expectations because…as her father, isn’t that what I’m doing?  Why don’t I give up on my daughter in the same fashion I encourage her to give up on her friends (of whom I disapprove)? I want the freedom to control my daughter’s freedom. People with lower expectations are easier to control. In my daughter’s eyes, someone with lower expectations will present an opportunity for her to “fix” others in a way her father could not achieve. Siiigh…learn to give up. I want the freedom of parenthood to control my daughter’s incentive (which equals freedom). Without consensus, freedom doesn’t meet anyone’s expectations (without the luxury of a compromise). Lower your expectations before your child does. Get it?
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We obey our mistakes. Do we learn from our mistakes? Sure. God doesn’t make mistakes perfect. God doesn’t make mistakes. I’m a mistake if God made me perfect. So I’m not a mistake. Are mistakes tedious? Then why do you repeat them? “Attention.” Do not love yourself through other people’s affection; otherwise, to love yourself is the only incentive you have to be nice. I call this Repetitive Failure Syndrome. My daughter puts her needs in front of her friends because she wants the freedom to control their freedom. Ironic, isn’t it? It’s okay when I (her father) behaves this way, but when I observe the same behavior in my daughter, I think like a hypocrite: “She must have low expectations.” Ironically, I want to fix her, even though I’ve proven above she’s not a mistake. On top of that, how well do you recall past experiences? If you can’t recall past experiences, you have no incentive to desire improvement. How many times can you make a mistake before you effectively commit the solution to memory? What’s being learned during that process depends entirely on what you can recall. If you recall nothing, all you can do as a response is react impulsively.  This is Repetitive Failure Syndrome. This is where thinking has to compensate.
Expectations are only as good as your memory. So what’s the solution? Lower your expectations before your children do. Let your six-year-old be six. Expectations are only as good as your memory, so someone is going to remember on your behalf what you shouldn’t do. Learn to give up on your expectations because they are insensible. If you never give up, it’s because you suck at quitting. Is quitting misguided if it avoids mistakes?
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82.0.0 Innocence Is a Worthless Treasure

Innocence is the best distraction we have from our impurities…because innocence does not resort to impairing our perception with impurities. However, what happens when innocence inspires our impurities to froth? Uh-oh. Someone will be outed as a creep. It is nature’s course (in this circumstance) to reveal reality as just an “assumption” when your best distraction stops working. That’s what happens when you are outed as a creep; the reality you refuse to acknowledge (you are a creep) pirouettes into an “assumption.” Example of a response to an accusation: “Me a creep?! Oh well that’s reality’s “assumption.” Why is reality an assumption? How is reality an assumption? A creep’s perception consists solely of distractions from their impurities. “You may distract me, my dear.” Unfortunately, when innocence “inspires” our impurities to froth, we can only perceive (and pursue) distractions that disprove reality’s assumptions (that you are a creep) are correct. That’s how reality becomes an assumption. If I was accused of being a creep, this is what I would say: “Reality assumed incorrectly.” What happens when your best distraction (from your impurities) stops working? Welcome to my insanity. That said, to a creep (like me)…innocence is a worthless treasure.
 
                                                                                Let’s start with puberty.
 
Those suffering from puberty resort to distracting others with impurities (for attention). Wait…how can innocence become impure? While innocence has pure intentions, it naively inspires a white-hot frenzy of unchecked enthusiasm, so technically innocence is not moral. Why? Innocence means you’ve done nothing wrong. You’ve broken no laws, committed no sins, and are not guilty of a morally evil act. Innocence inspires a white-hot frenzy of unchecked enthusiasm, which typically distracts us from our impurities (when it’s effective). It’s accepted that the innocent can do no wrong (i.e., like a screaming infant). What’s the thing about distraction? To be effective, innocence must outrun impurity’s progress with the help of your unchecked enthusiasm; a fruitless endeavor. Enthusiasm, whether inspired or misinterpreted (by the pervert), is not entirely innocent. Innocence rings true to the definition; however, what it inspires (in others) needs to successfully distract from the impurities bubbling beneath our unchecked enthusiasm. Why “unchecked” enthusiasm? Would you prefer “checked” enthusiasm? Would you prefer I investigate the integrity of your enthusiasm (and make that public knowledge)? That’s why our enthusiasm is “unchecked”; no one willing to be honest about the role perversion plays in our addiction to receiving and awarding others your attention.
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Moral means to be concerned with principles of right and wrong. If the enthusiasm (the innocent receive) is always affirming, the innocent’s concerns (toward their behavior) have little to do with morality and everything to do with the approval they award others. Concern with right and wrong is conflated with ‘what I like’ vs ‘what I don’t like.’ Innocence is adored because one is granted license to indulge growing children without apprehension. Why? Creeps can only perceive distractions from their impurities when it works; as adults most of us convinced ourselves that children have no impurities (puberty put an end to that). For now…they are innocent. Indulging growing children awards YOU their undivided attention without incentive (for you) to exercise discretion between right and wrong behavior, choosing to focus on what they like and dislike as your true motivation; not morality. Your choosing to indulge them serves only to maintain your pleasure. Why? Morality curbs your enthusiasm. Puberty puts an end to this cycle, because now the pleasure is sexual. How old does a child have to be until we can hold them accountable for their innocence? You are a pedophile.
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Why does the age of the person we address affect our behavior? Well…you can’t fuck a baby, agreed? Do you need a moment to shift that vision? Innocence inspires a WHITE-HOT frenzy of unchecked enthusiasm, which typically distracts us from our impurities through the gentle gift they give so freely: attention. It’s accepted that the innocent can do no wrong (i.e., like a screaming infant). What’s the thing about distraction? To live up to its reputation, it must outrun impurity’s progress by recruiting our “unchecked” enthusiasm (inspired by innocence but not authored). Have you ever wanted to bite a baby’s cheek, knead its thigh, or spike it like a football? Anything impulsive to choke the influence of enthusiasm before you lose control (and do something regrettable)? Your enthusiasm is not entirely innocent. Innocence rings true to the definition; however, what it inspires needs to successfully distract from the impurities bubbling beneath our unchecked enthusiasm…or it will translate into perversion.

A baby does not impair our perception with impurities. A baby is pure innocence, that’s why they are so easy to love and protect. If a baby inspires your impurities to froth, you are a BIG-time creep. Let’s say the baby grows up to be an attractive thirteen-year-old. Can you fuck a thirteen-year-old? According to biology, you sure can. It is nature’s course to reveal reality is just an assumption. What’s the assumption? Innocence is only moral when its target audience experiences the distraction successfully. Unsuccessfully well…thanks to perversion, you can fuck a thirteen-year-old. Question is, do you want to? Are you going to? Have you? Was it consensual? Innocence inspires a WHITE fucking HOT frenzy of unchecked enthusiasm, with the benefit (when successful) to distracting us from our impurities. It’s accepted that the innocent can do no wrong (i.e. like a screaming infant). What’s the thing about distraction? To work, it must outrun its audience’s impurities with their unchecked enthusiasm (inspired by innocence). Have you ever been sexually attracted to an underage teenager? Morality curbs your enthusiasm; enthusiasm is not innocent; innocence is not moral (repeat). Innocence rings true to the “definition,” but what it inspires needs to successfully distract its audience from the impurities growing beneath our unchecked enthusiasm.
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I’m sorry for repeating myself, but it’s necessary. Moral means to be concerned with principles of right and wrong. If the enthusiasm innocence receives is always affirmative, their concerns (toward their behavior) have less to do with morality and more to do with rewarding obedient creeps like you with their approval. Right and wrong is conflated with ‘what I like about you’ vs ‘what I don’t like about you.’  This to me explains their attitude, as if they know better; yeah…they know better about what THEY like; as if that could earn someone an award. Idiots. That’s why innocence is a commodity. Innocence is just like the appeal of baseball cards: without confidence-backed value, it’s a worthless treasure. Give up your virginity. Puberty signals (to perverts) that innocence has no more value; it’s a worthless treasure. Come on…let me take your virginity. When it comes to knowing what growing children like and dislike, that process highlights the origin of innocent’s appeal. Innocence is a commodity that can be controlled in the form of approval; creeps value approval, hence why innocence is a commodity. Innocence controls creeps. It’s like printing baseball cards that represent the evidence of value worth acquiring. Thanks to puberty, innocence is no longer a successful distraction; thanks to puberty, it naively INSPIRES perversion to flourish. This is what happens when your best distraction fails…YOU become AWARE of your creepiness; therefore, reality has assumed correctly. Understand now the consequence of being indulged (by adults) as a child (now as an adult) seeking approval of the growing children (you’ve indulged), chiefly to distract from the perversion innocence inspired (but not authored)? It didn’t just distract others from their impurities; your misinterpretations bred them within you. That’s why for distractions to work, they must always, always, always grow, hence the incentive to indulge, indulge, indulge. Double-down, double-down, double-down. That is why CONFIDENCE-based value is as distracting as innocence; it explains its popularity amongst creeps. 
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What a thirteen-year-old likes doesn’t mean I will approve of it. Perversion is about controlling YOUR impurity with a successful distraction; it’s not the responsibility (of the object of desire) to accommodate your perversion. Do you see why? Innocence is not entirely moral. Even though it is the best distraction we have…it’s never, ever good enough. Be honest with yourself and address the problem. This is what I call “Delayed Arousal.” The impurities accumulated through indulgences (and misinterpretations) over time are responsible for the creepiness you endeavor to ignore in the presence of underage teenagers (at least for me). Innocence is the best distraction we have from our impurities…because innocence does not resort to impairing our perception with impurities. However, what happens when innocence inspires our impurities to froth? Uh-oh. Someone will be outed as a creep. It is nature’s course (in this circumstance) to reveal reality as just an “assumption” when your best distraction stops working. That’s what happens when you are outed as a creep, the reality you refuse to acknowledge (you are a creep) pirouettes into an “assumption.” Example of a response to an accusation: “Me a creep?! Oh well that’s reality’s “assumption.” Why is reality an assumption? How is reality an assumption? A creep’s perception consists solely of distractions from their impurities. “You, my dear, may distract me.” Unfortunately, when innocence “inspires” our impurities to froth, we can only perceive (and pursue) distractions that disprove reality’s assumptions (that you are a creep) are correct. That’s how reality becomes an assumption. If I was accused of being a creep, this is what I would say. “Reality assumed incorrectly.” What happens when your best distraction (from your impurities) stops working? Welcome to my insanity. That said, to a creep (like me)…innocence is a worthless treasure.
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83.0.0 Gullible People Are Lazy Profit

If innocence can be wielded to control a creep, imagine a flock of creeps — obedient creeps. You can rule the world being a saint. Comfortably. Predictably. We are a planet of obedient creeps in which innocence is the only effective distraction from that truth: we are all pedophiles. Regardless of age and experience, it’s impossible to be platonic with someone you are attracted to. It’s impossible to ignore. I’ve tried. My efforts to ignore the attraction literally gave me brain damage. Innocence distracts you from your affliction. You don’t want it, and I sympathize. Ironically…that mechanism within that deescalates the allure is oddly attractive. Magnetism is a motherfucker. It’s impossible to maintain a platonic relationship once you fall in love. It’s impossible, and you know it. They are not worth the effort or the risk. I can’t afford to care. It was my fault for trying to prove it can be conquered. I didn’t know it, but I took for granted the value of ignorance, because it’s necessary. I said ignorance is a necessary evil.

What is the value of ignorance? Lazy profit. Just like it sounds. Doesn’t that sound good? Making money being lazy. That’s what sick leave feels like. It’s helped me realize I don’t want to work for my money anymore. So how do I do that? Get other people to work for me. Why would other people work for me? Well…I am a counterfeit evangelist. If you value honesty…support my cause. By the way, you are a pedophile. I only know what I don’t know. I don’t know God, but I sure as shit know why you REJECT him. I don’t care what you believe. I don’t care about you in this life or the next. I don’t care who you fuck, what game console you play, or how you make a living. Is stealing theft…if the gullible give? I’ve been a generous fool with my heart; perhaps I did this (so long) because I wanted to be the victim. Creeps are counterfeit evangelists crying for a piece of that lazy profit. Why be a victim when you can profit from one? That’s my style. Honesty is my idol. Can one be too honest? Apparently that is a sin. Being too honest is a sin. Why? It’s uncouth.

Do you value honesty? Liar. I want to be the “Victimer.” I’m more victim than you. I’m used to that lazy profit. I only wish (not pray) to be a better person. Man, it’s hard not to sound like a victim while asking the question: is stealing theft if the generous give? Are you generous with your heart? Then prepare to be the victim. Obedient, gullible creeps. Victims are criminals who beg for generosity. Is stealing theft if the gullible give? Victims only realize they are victims until after it’s obvious. If you don’t make it obvious, nothing changes, get it? When it wasn’t obvious, there was no crime committed. Victims donate toward their voluntary delusions. Stealing is not theft if the gullible give. I am gullible. I should have known better. But…do you value unflinching honesty? I’m willing to be wrong; I’m willing to not know. I’m willing to be right for that lazy profit…and if being brutally honest about the human animal earns me your support, I thank you. Remember, this moment is ironic. Are you gullible enough to trust me? If you donate to me, I am not stealing from you. You’re gullible. Just like me. Everyone is gullible. That’s why crime is a legit enterprise. That’s why I’m putting it in writing.
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Gullible people make lazy profit. Do you value honesty? Chris Rock said a man is only as good as his options. I have no options but to be honest.

 
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84.0.0 Pause the Cause

What’s more satisfying, happiness or happiness at the expense of your enemy? The only guarantee in life is change never changes. What am I talking about? Well, change always changes, but it will never guarantee your experience will be satisfying; lest we love hypocrisy. Case in point, do as I say, not as I do. Why would anyone love hypocrisy?  Change adores hypocrisy because its practice is confused with moral standards that no one is obliged to follow unless it guarantees them satisfaction (not happiness). What does this mean? There is no incentive (to accommodate circumstances) that require a diverse spectrum (of tolerance) to deservedly prosper. I don’t see tolerance when I see change; sardonically, I see intolerance. That’s the hypocrisy we love (which is ironic). Intolerance means change for what deserves to persist in our lives (at the expense of your enemy). What deserves to persist in our lives? Happiness at the expense of our enemies. Who’s our enemy? Those who stand in the way of our happiness. You are your own enemy. You can’t hide from yourself and claim you know better. Your enemy can’t change, so what makes you think you will? Is your enemy only as hostile as your intolerance?

What am I doing with my life? What a terrible way to make a living totally dependent on the subjective reasoning of strangers. I represent a cause that one day may trend aggressively. Are my enemies going to exchange their concern for my wellbeing thanks the desire for something more…novel? In this book I published my DARKEST revelation…what’s left for my enemies to tear down? Nothing. That won’t stop people from digging (into themselves). Why? They want to pause the cause. My cause. I’m here to explain why we are all a bunch of selfish hypocrites and cowards who deserve unhappiness. Why? I believe that is why I experienced psychosis, to objectively document the absurdity of the world. What makes me qualified? I identify as retarded. Who benefits from the absurdity? Those who pause the cause. I applaud those who resist progress, because they’ve found something that deserves to persist (i.e., intolerance for change). Just ignore me and my cause. What’s that? You can’t ignore me? You want to pause my cause? Happy hunting. I feel like a shark being dragged backward underwater.

I am such a hypocrite, but I am no coward. Who benefits from the absurdity? The cowards. You are absurd to think your advantages are not an illusion (like the value of baseball cards). If the advantage is not obvious it’s an illusion, nothing changes. When it wasn’t obvious, there was no crime committed. Pause the cause is actually a response to fright. It’s not that people don’t want to change…they’re afraid people will know they can’t change. When they do change, it’s never obvious that change was scripted. Pause the cause is a buffer between unimpressionable tribes of thought. This planet was neatly fractured (with natural and manufactured borders), but now with the lines blurred, we have, as Spencer Rice describes, a ‘cultural mosaic.’ They don’t adapt. They (against reason) multiply. They take advantage of hospitality. They offend others. They oppress difference of opinion. They never change. Change never changes. Is that good? What happens when no change is what’s needed? Why is that offensive? Change is always to the rescue (trying to change). Do you get it? Change can’t change, because it has a fluid nature, which appeals to the intolerant. Change is doing a really good job avoiding the inevitable.  What is the inevitable?
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You don’t care to change unless you change those who care (on your behalf). I don’t care to change, because my ideas deserve to resist change. I resist change because I don’t care. Pause the cause. My cause is about change. I feel like a shark being dragged backward underwater. I’m underwater, but I’m drowning because I’m being dragged toward time (not forward). Time is not forward, it’s backward (when you dwell on the past). Time is subjective. Is change our time? Get it? Is change our version of 
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time? We only observe time through culture. There’s no changing that mentality, because it’s a survival tool. Humans must impact culture (through change) to tell the time. If I have to change to feel happy, I’d prefer to feel miserable. Get it? Why must I work for happiness…sounds to me happiness isn’t worth the effort if it’s not effortless. Change never changes. I stopped caring about changing you, reader, because (to me) you are not worth the effort. Pause the cause.
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85.0.0 You Are a Moral Prostitute

I won two Toronto Raptors tickets during Christmas of 2019. I took my soon-to-be seven-year-old daughter to watch the game downtown. After I parked the car, I took her for a short walk through the city, looking for a gift for her mother. On the way back to the Scotiabank Arena, I saw two little girls wearing foreign clothing sitting off to the side of the foot traffic, triggering an experience years ago I had with a homeless pregnant lady (it was awkward). I knew I had four dollars in loonies. Both of them were holding empty plastic mugs to accept change. I said, “Here you go” *clunk…clunk* and the older one said, “Thank you.” Easily under ten years old, with no mother or father in sight. She had an accent, I suspect Syrian. As I walked away, a little voice whispered into my brain, “Give them more.” Again and again as I walked farther away this voice whispered, “Give them more, give them more.” I didn’t. I could have turned around and walked back. But I didn’t.

Later on, we were in the arena watching the game. I kept thinking about those two homeless children. Why didn’t I turn back? At some point I decided after the game was over, my daughter and I would head back to Union Station and hand the eldest child a fifty-dollar bill. We ended up leaving after the third quarter in a bid to clear my conscience. We passed by a convenience store along the way, and it occurred to me I should buy them something to eat or drink, because you can’t eat money. I thought bottled water for some reason, but for the sake of time my daughter encouraged me to go with my gut. We arrived at the spot I last saw them, but the children were gone. As a consolation, it was warm in the station; warmer than being outside. I didn’t get to clear my conscience...was that my only motivation? Is conscience moral? I forgot to mention I was planning to donate the coat off my back dividing it between the two of them. Oooooh, I’m soooo good; what a lovely story this will make for my audience. What was my true motivation? I am ashamed to discover the reality of the Shy Fool. Shy fools are known to donate their conscience for approval.

Yeah…so to recap, I gave two homeless children four dollars in change with a wallet full of bills. I had the opportunity to turn back, but I didn’t. You know why? Too shy…too shy thinking about what people must think of me donating my conscience like I’m some sort of savior (or sucker). The best art never sees the light of day. Shyness is for the weak of conscience. Is that a bad thing? Am I a “savior” for exercising my conscience, or am I a sucker for circumstance? Why the fuck did I care so much about what strangers could think of me? What should I have done? Shy fools are not foot soldiers trained (with pack mentality) to disregard awkward circumstances. Traveling in numbers assures an “individual” can easily disregard life’s awkward circumstances. Why? Shy Fools require a stranger’s permission to deserve their approval. Assuming you had the courage to accept their approval (which you don’t). I don’t believe you.
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According to Wikipedia, conscience is a cognitive process that elicits emotion and rational associations based on an individual's moral philosophy or value system. If the integrity of your values hinges chiefly on the hasty reaction of strangers, the shy fool’s role serves to remind those traveling in numbers the sensation of conscience by raising their awareness (through donations). If the integrity of your values hinges chiefly on the hasty reaction of strangers, the shy fool’s role serves to remind those traveling in numbers the sensation of conscience by raising their awareness (through donations). I thought you needed a reminder. So is conscience simply designed to make you feel better if you do something right? Isn’t right subjective? Where’s the audit? Maybe your conscience is not the highest standard for judging morality, it’s the highest standard for judging other people’s opinions. People donate to charity for superficial reasons — even Shy Fools. There’s no such thing as charity, only commerce. 
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Begging is a job. A beggar’s job is to exercise the conscience of strangers. Warmth from the sun is charity, shade is commerce. Get it? I exercised my conscience by giving away my money around strangers. Well…a small amount, because I didn’t want to look like a “sucker.” But afterward, when all the strangers were gone, I raced back waving a fifty-dollar bill in my hand. Sigh…The Shy Fool is remarkably modest with their donations. That’s an example why conscience has NOTHING to do with morality, because conscience is only capable of judging opinions that lead us to doing the right thing. Being right is subjective.

That’s why I…I need your permission before I am eligible to deserve your approval (which I must earn). Some would say that is pathetic; I would say it’s modest. Commerce too deems charity modest. Is commerce a “savior” or a “sucker”? How about I just mention confidence. How the fuck do you build confidence? Accept who you are, because you can’t change the fact you’re a piece of shit; but you can apologize for it for the rest of your life. What happens if you don’t apologize? You’re a dick; how the hasty reaction of strangers influences your conscience is moral prostitution. You are a moral prostitute. Don’t be a “savior” just because your conscience says so. Don’t do what feels right; do what is right. Everything you do is important; at least you think so. I don’t believe you. Everything. Reading this book is the MOST IMPORTANT THING YOU CAN DO, because you have “chosen” to read this book (assuming you paid for it). You are the chosen one being important for others. Such charity. Is conscience a charity? Is charity the savior or the sucker? That dictates our conscience. Charity is the savior; my conscience says that’s the right thing to do. Is this all we are? It’s what makes us stand out in the universe? That’s probably not such a good thing. When you want to talk down to an awkward child, simply say, “You’re different from everyone else.” Keep telling yourself that. We are the same species, and that makes us all the same. Humans are pathetic because we arrest the truth. Humans thinking they are arresting the criminal…no, humans love to arrest the truth.  You’re under my arrest, and unless you cooperate there will be trouble.
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Falling in love with a colleague was the worst decision I have ever done. I don’t recommend it. If this happens to you, find another job. I’ve lost focus on the point of this article. Audit your conscience and hold it to task. Are your intentions genuinely charitable? If your intentions are not genuinely charitable, know that conscience is only the highest standard for judging other people’s opinions. I don’t know God, but I sure as shit know why you reject him. Your conscience is important, but it’s not the highest. You donate your conscience because you believe you are important. Important people have a charitable conscience. Why? Pending your permission, they have the courage to accept your approval. I hope that makes sense. 
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86.0.0 My Brand Is My Faith

Let me introduce to you Satan:
 
“Vanity…definitely my favorite sin.”
 
Yes…I speak to Satan. He speaks through me. I write it down. I’m proof Satan is real. Is that insight valuable? I’m unfit to do anything else but be a Counterfeit Evangelist. This is the best I can contribute to society. I used to be a model employee working for the largest bank in Canada, winning its highest awards. Now…I’m on disability leave having conversations with the Lord of Lies. Look at the line below and mark it with an “X” that best reflects you. I’ll wait.
 
Pedophile _______________________________________________________ Jesus
 
If you are honest with yourself, you will fall middle of the road. This mark fluctuates based on what you wish to share or hide from other people’s inquiries. If someone accused you of being a pedophile, what would you share about yourself? “That’s not true (I’m Jesus).” What would you hide? “That is true (I’m a pedophile).” If someone accused you of being Jesus, what would you share about yourself? “I’m not Jesus.” What would you hide? “Actually…I am Jesus.” I am bipolar, so I have no middle ground; it’s either one or the other. If someone accused me of being a pedophile, I’ll be ready, because I have this book. I want to achieve the impossible. I’m outing myself as a forty-one-year-old man that is sexually attracted to underage teenagers because I’m addicted to conception; it's a nuisance. Don’t you think a rational person would do everything in their power to hide this fact? Do you value honesty? Now? FUCK, no. Now you have to choose between instinct and delusion. Go ahead and place an “X” on the line that best reflects you. I’ll wait.
 
Instinct _______________________________________________________ Delusion
 
I’m not passing the blame on to Satan, because that’s not how this works. Instinct and delusion are natural. That’s not to say it can’t be revolting, arousing intense distaste or disgust. What are we attempting to hide through our disgust? What will other people think of me? Plead ignorance! Cast shame! Stigmatize inconvenient truth!  Go ahead and place an “X” on the line that best represents you. I’ll wait.
 
Shame _______________________________________________________ Ignorance
 
I’m not sorry for who I am. I’m bipolar. I’m a pedophile (by definition) because I can’t help to have the thoughts I have. I don’t want this but…it’s what makes me human. I didn’t ask for brain damage. I didn’t ask to be woken. Maybe I did. Doing something “impressive” is not necessarily attractive. If I blew the biggest fart in the world, that would be considered impressive, but is that attractive? Heh, do you value 
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