JOHN RALPH TUCCITTO IS 'SARDONIC POET'
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The Shitty Butler

Fathers exist to amuse their children.
Theme song created by John Ralph Tuccitto

Imagine an exterminator installing rat food instead of poison:

4/26/2019

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Home Owner: What the fuck are you doing?  Is that that Gouda?

Exterminator: I ran out of Swiss.

Home Owner: Why are you-where are the traps?!

Exterminator:  Oh...sorry there must be some confusion.  Did you say you want more rats?

Home Owner: What-the-I can't...who the fuck wants rats?

Exterminator: Now that you mention it...I can't think of a person who would want more rats.  

​Home Owner: Get the fuck out of my house.

Exterminator: Ah yes my confusion was linked to stupidity.

Home Owner: Oh SHIT a MOUSE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!

Exterminator: You sure dooooo don't like rats.

Home Owner: You guys hiring?
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Just sayin...

4/24/2019

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Wife:  Why you keep standing next to me when I cook?

Husband: I don't want you to ask "where is that piece of shit?"  I'm right here.

Wife: You are a hypocrite.

Husband: Whens that stopped anybody before now?
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    The Shitty Butler

    I'm kind of like your husband whom which you pay to do the chores you hate.

    I specialize in cleaning toilets akin to the quality I deem acceptable, making my signature pizzas for your dinner, finally washing most of your dishes before I leave.

    No charge for middle-class. ;)

    Now serving Georgetown Ontario, Canada.

    Book an appointment via email with the subject line reading:

    "Hey shit head..."

    john.tuccitto@sardonicpoet.com

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